Fear is the number one feeling most of us feel when it comes to dating. And it’s especially no surprise that lots of people in wheelchairs are afraid to date or think that dating with a disability isn’t possible. We can be afraid; afraid of rejection, explaining our disability, of being seen as a burden. And then we just don’t even try to date. Don’t let that happen to you! A wheelchair may make it trickier to find someone, but it’s never a roadblock. Just watch these three videos below about people’s positive dating with a disability experiences.
The first video is all about finding out the world is better than you thought. It features a beautiful Latina woman who was injured when she was just 11 years old. At the time of her injury, she of course wasn’t worried about boys or what her prospects in dating might lead to. That kind of stuff wasn’t on her radar yet. But now, she’s a strong young woman who’s been dating with a disability, and she’s discovered some important things about dating from a wheelchair.
In the video, she talks about how she was scared when she began dating, and felt incredibly intimidated, worried if boys would still like her. “How will they view me?” “I didn’t want pity,” she shares. But boys DID ask her out, proving that it was still to possible find many people who’ll still see you for you. The take away from this video is: Don’t let the bad nuggets make you not want to try at all. Watch it here
The second video is of a couple – an able-bodied women and a chef with C5-6 quadriplegia – talking about their dating experience. She talks about when they first met, and how she never knew anybody in a wheelchair before (and of course had a lot of questions). I love how she shares their first date (he made pasta for her at his house) and how she had to drink two glasses of wine to find the courage to ask if his “you know what” still worked (always a question you have to brace yourself for).
And I love how she says she vehemently believes she isn’t missing anything in life from having a partner who uses a wheelchair. In fact, she says she’s gained “a prize” if nothing else, saying her boyfriend Cory is more sensitive and passionate than any of her girlfriend’s boyfriends by far. Watch the couple share their story
And the third video is a gem. If you’re looking for a personal experience video that discusses dating with a disability experiences in-depth, you’ll love this one from Erika Bogan, Ms. Wheelchair 2010. In her 15 minute video, she intimately shares what dating was like when she was first injured, and what it’s like for her now. Being a single mother and a wheelchair-user, she felt like she had two strikes against her when she started out. In her video though, she talks about how how wrong she was. Watch her video now
It may seem daunting, but you really can find someone who’ll look past your wheelchair. Dating, unfortunately, is a necessary evil to get there (I always like to say my wheelchair is the ultimate “jerk filter” haha). What I love about these three videos is that they exemplify this idea perfectly – yes we all can find love.
If you’re still looking, in the meantime make sure to surround yourself with positive videos like these. Positive imagery can help you put out immensely when sending out successful vibes.
What dating tips do you swear by for dating with a disability?
Watch the videos!